Airport interrogation

May we aks you some question? We are sorry our poor English.

Sure.

Thanks you. Number one. Are this your bag?

Yes. It is my bag.

Good. Number two. You pack this bag yourself?

Yes I did. Then my cousin threw a couple of things in last minute like. But I packed it myself, yes.

OK. Number three. Did anybody give you something to carry?

I don't carry stuff for anyone. Besides the powder for my uncle in the militia, that is. Normally I only carry stuff that's all my own you know.

Good. Number four. Are you carrying any dangerous goods?

Nothing dangerous. 'Cept the mace and the AK47 that my cousin said I really should take along, but they don't count as dangerous.

Nothing dangerous. Thank you sir. You may board. Have a pleasant flight.